Your Situation May Look More Like This?

AP Photo by Wei Seng Chen, Malaysia

Retrieved 2013, 2/16

You may feel you are on the horns of a dilemma. It runs you around and you feel powerless, helpless and confused.

 

Man Hole

You feel sunk, completely in the dark. You feel as though you have fallen into a hole and you have no idea how to get out. You may feel a bit of panic!

You want to fix it, repair it, control it, stop it! But no matter what you do, nothing seems to fix, repair, control or stop it.  

 

There are a couple of questions that you need to ask yourself. Your responses might give you a glimmer of wisdom into the root of your situation whether it be one on the horns of a dilemma or a descent into a dark hole.

Question Number 1: Are you able to see the possibility that wanting it otherwise and taking things personally are the two horns of the dilemma? 

Question Number 2: Can you consider even just a little bit that the misery you feel is your teacher? 

Suffering is considered a mark of existence and disappointment in Buddhism is considered a heavenly messenger but you need to be able to see it. Otherwise, you will take it personally and continue to be pulled about by the two bulls or stuck in a dark hole.

Dissatisfaction comes in array of experiences and range. Whatever it might be for you it can often feel like you have fallen into a dark hole. You determine to give it one more try, one more attempt to make yourself into something you want, somebody who you think will make all the difference, and you try to get what you want. You pull your self up by your bootstraps, fortify yourself with false hopes and wishful thinking and once again go after what you think the world owes you and what you think you deserve. But find you are merely going out onto another limb that ultimately will not sustain you. But you'll give it another shot. What else can you do?

 

You may want to consider these 4 things in life that make you miserable, unhappy and dissatisfied.

1. Not getting what you want
2. Getting what you want but being dissatisfied with what you got
3. Not being with those you love
4. Being with those you do not love

These 4 things cover most of what disappoints you. They are in the very least part of the cause for your situation. Take some time to contemplate your situation and see if you are able to place yourself in one of these 4 misery makers. 

If, for example, you live in a situation you hate and you want it to be different you suffer from not getting what you want and being with those you do not love. It is not enough to think this is true, you need to recognize the ego-hunger within yourself using these 4 statements. 

SO in this example it would be helpful to say to yourself, "I am not getting what I want, and I am not with those I love." 

Now the reason you need to do this is to stop the blame or the aggression and aversion going outward into the world and recognize the root of the misery is in "your wanting it to be different." If you are able to do this, even ever so slightly you begin to see a glimpse of wisdom. The glimpse, even a trace of it allows you to follow the traces of wisdom depicted in the next Ox Herder picture. 

Zen requires at least a glimmer or smudge of self-reflection to enter the path. If you think you know, and if you think you are "right" and you are adamant about what you think, you must do a fair bit of work on softening those hardened parts of the wild ego mind. Pride and anger are the big bulls that can run you around for quite some time. They need to be tamed. 

Don't despair. It's never too late to begin to tame them. And it takes as long as it takes to do so.