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| OM! Grow Up. That's the End! |
The back end of the Ox is taking a look at....well...at the back end of things. The back end of the self that drags you by the tail, those things in your conditioned self that you just can't seem to manage or deal with. It often has to do with change or uncertainty or some struggle that you don't want to face or see. It's often the time when you say, "I can't stand it!" And then watch what happens. It's all the times when you didn't get what you want, or are not where you want to be.
It requires confession. But the confession only comes when you actually sense the back end of the ox for yourself about yourself. It's like the following:
A student goes to his teacher and whines, "I've lived a stupid life."
"So have I," replies the teacher.
When you see it, you realize how stupid you've been, how childish or selfish or self-involved. A spiritual friend resonates with such a realization and confesses it to be so. So it is, so it is.
The next time there's no ground to stand on, don't consider it an obstacle. Consider it a remarkable stroke of luck. We have no ground to stand on, and at the same time it could soften us and inspire us. Finally, after all these years, we could truly grow up. As Trungpa Rinpoche once said, the best mantra is "OM—grow up—svaha." Retrieved 2/2013 Pema Chodron
Thank you, LIz.
ReplyDeleteDealing with the back end of things can be painful—or maybe resisting or considering it as negative is painful. It reminds me of meditation teachers who help people deal with physical pain by helping them see it with curiosity and labeling it as “sensation” rather than “pain.”
Hi Barbara.
DeleteYes, you see the truth of looking at the back end. It can and is painful at times to come to terms with the delusions of the ego-self.
What is the alternative?
Liz
Having a child is very much like looking at the back end. I see that much like a child, I only want to do what I want to do and typically that is what comes easy to me. Anything that requires real discipline or effort is pushed aside or forgotten. "I don't wanna practice, I don't wanna get up early, I don't wanna, I don't wanna, I DON'T WANT TO...." And very much like a child "Don't tell me what to do..." Obedience thus becomes a quid pro quo: "I will do it, if I get to have what I want..."
ReplyDeleteOf course much of this is habit and reaction. I recently read an article in which Pema Chodron recommends pausing before one does or says anything. Later, I was trying to explain the difference of doing an act (contribution) rather than giving something up (deprivation) for Lent to Rachel. And then it dawned on me that I too, can do something for Lent...pause. Pausing breaks the recalcitrant habit and reactive way of being.
Blessings and bows to all, especially those of us who have not yet grown up.
Thank you, Liz, for the benefits of this teaching.
Hi Toni.
ReplyDeleteAh...yes, a pause is very helpful to slow the reactive impulse from just popping off.
Pause--Breathe--Pause
And it shows how much of what we say is nonsense.
Liz